[The Eagle]

@Lao7 Thanks for this beautiful question o.

When I get to speak on this kinda topic, what readily comes to mind is marriage covenant.

If both parties know that whoever earns what does not really matter, and that both parties’ earnings are to be seen as a “single” earning for the family, it won’t matter if the woman is brining in more.

Cos, gone are those days when men feel important because they provide money. That was an incomplete approach our fathers demonstrated though.

Beyond money, there is so much more to provide as a man in his home. Leadership. Direction. Spiritual covering. Mentorship. You name it!

Money is not and should not be the ultimate thing a man brings to the table in his home. Cos right now, some women have tons of cash but they are looking for men who have these other offerings to bring to the table.

[The Eagle]

All thanks to God Ola. Super glad you got all the insightful and practical answers to your questions.

Please feel free to reach out anytime you have more questions.

God bless you!

[The Eagle]

Spot on! 🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽📌📌📌

I love the Daddy GO and the Minister’s story you shared. Learnt a lot from that. It further confirmed some things I have been meditating on lately: knowing WHY I do what I do.

I just made some business decisions that appear like I was expecting some kind of “THANK YOU” but didn’t get it, and I was bewildered for a sec.

Then I went back to WHY I made that decision and saw that I did it in service to God. Even though I didn’t get the thank you I really was expecting, I saw the pain of not even getting that and still forging ahead as an act of worship to God.

That law school story blessed me in no small measure! Thank you! 🙏🏽 🙏🏽🙏🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽❤️❤️

[The Eagle]

Awesome! ❤

[The Eagle]

Hey Ola,

Thanks for being so real! You need not to beat yourself up if you feel prayer ain’t the first thing that comes to mind when you’re in that situation.

We are all human, and we have our downtimes too. We created this space for this same reason: to ensure you have a place you can come and express yourself, get succor from fellow men who have been through what you’re experiencing, and get some good advice too.

I think another thing I’ll add is this: you can set targets and goals. And win them gradually. Anytime you feel that way, ask yourself, what target have I set on this matter? Have I met that target, if yes, then you’re good.

For instance, you can set a target that every time you feel overwhelmed, you’ll talk to at least one person you trust that will understand you and really listen to you.

Finding that person can even be the first target to set. Once you find that person, you can tick that box and say you are moving in the right direction.

For every target you set and meet, celebrate yourself. Let that inner peace you derive per time when you meet such goals drive your confidence and push you to set more targets in the right direction.

Another target could even be, in 24 hours, I used to feel this way 5 times before. I want to set it to reduce to 3 max per day, and then 2, then 1, the none over time.

Just deal with it one step at a time without expecting a rapid turnaround overnight.

Hope this helps.

[The Eagle]

❤️❤️

[The Eagle]

Thank you, Ola, for asking this very important question.

Validation is a core part of any man and it feeds into every aspect of every man’s life and living.

From my personal experience, I have had to resort to understanding that there is actually no external validation that I can get that will fill that void in me as an individual. Only God validates me per time.

Sometimes I look at my family and all the sacrifices I make daily, and no matter the “thank you”s I get from my Wife and Children, I still look up to God to say “hope I am doing well”?

It is that internal conversation I have with God and what He shows me as valid in all my actions that really makes me happy. No amount of “thank you” from my Wife and Children gets me there, really.

While the “thank you” temporarily makes me feel fulfilled, what really does it for me is when I weigh all my actions, and I can satisfactorily say that God is pleased with me and all my actions as far as my family is concerned, that is when I really feel validated.

I’ll leave it to other men as they join this discussion to answer more from their perspective. This is my own experience and I really hope it helps you. Blessings! ❤️❤️

[The Eagle]

See perspective! So practical and true. @Toks sense choke for this comment! Thanks a lot for sharing that perspective.

[The Eagle]

@Adebiyi Amazing submission! So much wisdom packed in this perspective just like @NikkiB shared yesterday! Kudos People!

[The Eagle]

Thank you Adenike! Truly appreciate your candour. Can’t wait for more replies.